I now weigh 300 pounds.

Because I spent months whining about celebrating my birthday in St. Louis my co-workers have been shoving cake and cosmos down my gullet at every opportunity... not that I'm complaining, it's been really fun... but I do officially way 3 billion pounds.

Also it seems that sometimes I am a little slow... ... on Monday night we all went to a restaurant that is fantastic! Just... so... very... good! I had foie gras and rabbit for the first time, that's how good it was.... but I digress... I had so much that I wasn't going to have dessert but then I got a second wind and when they brought my cake with a sparkler there was absolutely no connect in my mind... I thought it was part of the normal presentation of the restaurant. I told all my dining companions "Look how fancy! They serve their deserts with sparklers!"

People wonder why I love Bridget Jones so much when I am obviously not a single girl. It is moments like "Wow, they serve their deserts with sparklers!" that make me feel that Bridget is my literary sister.... now, I must get back to developing inner poise.